no i won't become a song writer, i still prefer science tq xD

yo, bloggah! i'm feeling a bit angsty(hahaha who told you to read Gundam 00 angst-fic, idiot)

okay, enough with jokes

today i want to post something serious(lol) 
.
.
.

sometimes

sometimes i wonder
why?

why can't anybody else see what i can?
(not ghost btw, thank God)

i wonder

or is it really just in my mind?
but it's there
and only dad understands, it seems

people around me says,
"a new wind is blowing.."

but,

but what i see is a hurricane slowly forming(okay,this is OOC xDD)

but it's really,
again, dad agrees

some people says 
"it'll be fine, nothing to be worried off"
but i can't help but imagine
what could be the worst outcome
i can't stop myself even if i want to
i wanted to
but i can't

maybe i'm just paranoid
maybe..
(i very much hope for the best)


(and this thing slowly starts to sound like a song lyric, damn J-rocks xDDD)

so said "look at the reality around you,"
"don't avert your eyes from the reality,"
but all i can see is people fighting
maybe there's no bullets flying overhead
maybe there's no buildings exploding left and right
maybe there's not a sound of chaos that ever penetrates my hearing
but isn't just the same?
the only difference is some people fighting desperately for their life, future
and some fights just because something doesn't agree to their preferences

it's stupid
it's too stupid
so stupid that it makes me laugh
so stupid it leaves tears in my eyes

while i'm never a saint
i'm just a human
struggling to be the best
struggling to reach the best possible goal ever dreamed of a human

but i still can't help think that i might be a bad person
but nobody is born bad
it's just that they choose to be
i don't want to be one
i just want to be myself
for myself, my parents, my family, my friends
that's all

i don't need kick ass powers

i am neither strong nor weak
i'll make do with whatever i have
whatever i'm given(by the God)
and that's more than enough

sometime,
sometime i wonder

if i have a rather negative view of the world(initially)

(the beauty of the world shall not be tarnished)

even if destruction befalls

after all, there's always a silver-lining behind every storm cloud

just wait
(or just cut open your own road, write your own happy ending)

mae wo muke, ikiyou ze :)